Saturday, February 27, 2010
1. Parental Alienation
The effects of Parental Alienation can be extremely damaging to children and families alike, my goal here is to inform and educate, give resources and help you find ways to protect your children from the harmfull effects of parental alienation.I would like to open the blog to your comments and suggestions for our users.Our children deserve to be treated with dignity and respect,The Honorable Judge Gomery of Canada stated, "Hatred is not an emotion that comes naturally to a child. It has to be taught. A parent who would teach a child to hate the other parent represents a grave and persistent danger to the mental and emotional health of that child."In severe PAS the child is often fanatic or obsessional in his/her hatred of the target parent. For this reason alone the PAS-inducing parent no longer needs to be active, although the PAS-inducing parent will resort to anything to prevent the child maintaining a relationship with the targeted parent. The child takes on the PAS-inducing parent's desires, emotions and hatreds and verbalises them all as its own. The child views the history of the targeted parent and the targeted parent's family as all negative and is unable to either remember or express any positive feelings for the target parent..The child is very likely to refuse Contact, make false allegations of abuse, threaten to run away, threaten to commit suicide or even murder - if forced to see the targeted parent. The PAS-inducing parent will hold little or no value for the targeted parent and hatred may be completely overt.. The child and the alienating parent have a pathological bond that is invariably based on shared paranoid fantasies of the targeted parent, sometimes to the point of folie a deux.What Does a Severely Alienated Child look like?They have a relentless hatred for towards the targeted parent.They parrot the Obsessed Alienator.The child does not want to visit or spend any time with the targeted parent.Many of the child's beliefs are enmeshed with the alienator.The beliefs are delusional and frequently irrational.They are not intimidated by the court.Frequently, their reasons are not based on personal experiences with the targeted parent but reflect what they are told by the Obsessed Alienator. They have difficulty making any differentiate between the two.The child has no ambivalence in his feelings; it's all hatred with no ability to see the good.They have no capacity to feel guilty about how they behave towards the targeted parent or forgive any past indiscretions.They share the Obsessed Alienators cause. Together, they are in lockstep to denigrate the hated parent.The children's obsessional hatred extends to the targeted parent's extended family without any guilt or remorse.They can appear like normal healthy children until asked about the targeted parent that triggers their hatred.Children in the severe category are generally quite disturbed and are usually fanatic. They join together with their alienating parent in a folie à deux relationship in which they share her paranoid fantasies about the alienated parent. All eight of the primary symptomatic manifestations are likely to be present to a significant degree, even more prominent than in the moderate category. Children in this category may become panic-stricken over the prospect of visiting with their alienated parent. Their blood-curdling shrieks, panicked states, and rage outbursts may be so severe that visitation is impossible. If placed in the alienated parent's home they may run away, become paralyzed with morbid fear, or may become so continuously provocative and so destructive that removal becomes necessary. Unlike children in the moderate and mild categories, their panic and hostility may not be reduced in the alienated parent's home, even when separated from their alienating parents for significant periods. Whereas in the mild and moderate categories the children's primary motive is to strengthen the stronger, healthy psychological bond with the alienating parent, in the severe category the psychological bond with the alienating parent is pathological (often paranoid) and the symptoms serve to strengthen this pathological bond.